


Please Hold Me

by marigoldtears



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Panic Attacks, Sad Jughead is Sad, Underage Drinking, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-29
Updated: 2017-03-29
Packaged: 2018-10-12 12:35:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10491000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marigoldtears/pseuds/marigoldtears
Summary: Another clap of thunder sounded above just as Archie noticed the state his friend was in. Jughead’s eyes were squeezed tightly shut, his whole body flinching when the thunder sounded. Still not opening his eyes, hands clenched into fists, Jughead murmured, “Oh, fuck.”Or, Jughead and Archie are stuck at Walgreens during a storm and Jughead is terrified of thunder and lightning.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is my first fic on ao3 so I'm sorry if it's a bit of a mess. I would love some constructive criticism!
> 
> I also wrote this all tonight from 11 pm to 2 am, so (obviously) it is not beta'd, and I apologize for any errors.
> 
> This is also based off of a prompt I got from colormayfade's prompt generator on tumblr. The prompt was: "we're stuck in a convenience store because there's a huge-ass storm and you're freaking the fuck out because you're terrified so i guess since i'm your best friend i'll just sit with you in this isle and sing to you to try and calm you down". Obviously I changed it a bit and accidentally made it waaaay more angsty, but I hope it turned out alright nonetheless!
> 
> Also, trigger warning for anxiety and/or panic attacks. Although I have anxiety and intrusive thoughts, I myself have never had a panic attack (thank god), although I've been on the verge a few times. So, if you find this inaccurate or wrong in any way, don't hesitate to let me know!

Looking back, maybe getting a bit tipsy and then walking across town to get snacks at 1 am wasn’t the best idea. In the moment, however, the plan had seemed foolproof.

The thing was, Jughead and Archie had only just started to speak to each other again after what Jughead had started to call “The Summer of Miscommunication”. Therefore, any free time that both of them had was being spent together. Unfortunately, with Archie’s football practice and singing rehearsals, he was really only able to hang out at night. This was no problem for Jughead, who spent almost every day at Pop’s.

So, after around 10 pm became designated time for Jughead and Archie to spend trying to mend their fractured relationship. Normally this time was spent simply watching shitty romance films that Archie secretly adored and Jughead tolerated, or playing Mario Party on the Wii until dawn. However, this particular Thursday, both boys were restless. Archie had an especially difficult practice, and Jughead, unbeknownst to Archie, had been kicked out of the drive inn where he had been living for the past 8 months.

It was Archie’s idea in the end. After attempting to watch Scott Pilgrim vs. The World for 20 minutes, Archie popped up from his place next to Jughead on the floor of his room, muting the television with the remote.

“Alright, this is super boring.” He said, stretching his arms above his head in an attempt to ease the aches that had sprung up during practice.

Jughead looked up at Archie blearily, having zoned out for a good minute, staring at the television but not comprehending anything that the characters were saying. He sighed, pushing himself up with his left hand and scratching the back of his neck with the right. “I agree completely. But honestly, what else do you suggest we do? Take a nature walk? Do homework? It’s-” Jughead glanced at the clock sitting on Archie’s nightstand, “-almost ten-thirty, there’s nothing to do, and anything that we could do, I’m too tired commit to. Honestly, I’m so tired I might die.”

Archie grinned at his friend’s dramatics, and then appeared to be steeling himself to say something, his smile fading and his arms crossing. “Maybe there’s nothing to do right now, but I might have something to drink.” A smile tugged at the corner of his mouth, but it balanced precariously on his face, hesitant, unsure. 

Jughead frowned for a second, looking back at the television, eyes seeing the screen but not paying attention to what was going on. Generally, Jughead made it a point not to drink after seeing what it did to people first-hand with his father. However, he did have alcohol occasionally with Archie or Veronica, or even Betty and Kevin when they came along, where Jughead knew he was safe. 

Above all else, Jughead knew he was safe with Archie.

Jughead looked back up at Archie. A smile tugged at the corner of Archie’s mouth, but it was hesitant, wavering. It was a clear message- If you don’t want to, we don’t have to. I understand.

Hating to see Archie even remotely upset, Jughead allowed one of his genuine smiles to break through. “As long as we’re not stealing it from your dad, I’m down- but only a little bit, okay, it’s a school night. I’m trying to graduate high school.”

Archie’s face softened immediately, and he uncrossed his arms, stretching a hand out to Jughead to help him stand. Jughead placed his hand in Archie’s, ignoring the slight pool of warmth that grew in his stomach at the touch. “Yeah, of course, only a little bit,” Archie promised, his voice sincere. “And don’t worry, we aren’t stealing it from my dad- we’re stealing it from Veronica.”

Archie’s smirk was now out in full force as he reached under his bed, grabbing a six-pack of beer with only four bottles remaining. Jughead recognized the brand as the one that Veronica always brought over. “No way,” Jughead exclaimed, letting the ‘o’ in the first word drag out much longer than necessary. “You didn’t actually steal this from her man, did you?”

Archie looked at Jughead affronted, but somehow still sincerely, and Jughead couldn’t help but think again with the puppy dog eyes, please stop that Andrews I can’t handle this every time you become mildly emotional. “Of course I didn’t steal them. Last time V came over she said I could keep the rest of the bottles.” Archie moved to sit down on his bed, placing the beer beside him. “And now, we can finally put them to use.” Archie patted the spot on his bed next to himself, gesturing for Jughead to sit.

Sighing, Jughead sat down next to Archie, who handed him a bottle. “This is a bad idea,” Jughead said. Archie gave Jughead a pointed look, that Jughead could tell was just intended to be a scolding really, Jughead?. 

“Maybe,” Archie admitted, “But it’ll be fun.”

*****

Archie was right- it was fun, for a little while.

At around eleven-thirty, after each consuming two beers, both Jughead and Archie made the joint decision that they were hungry. They also decided that they could not simply eat the food that was already in the Andrew’s refrigerator- they needed new, fresh food. Food that, to quote Jughead, was “fresh out of the hands of the greedy capitalists who come up with all of the artificial junk food in the first place” (“If I’m going to eat packaged junk food instead of actual prepared food, you better bet your ass that it’ll be freshly packaged, Andrews.”).

Both boys stumbled downtown, walking about four blocks. After a bit, it became clear that although they drank the same amount, Jughead was significantly more out of sorts than Archie. Whereas Archie’s speech was slightly slurred and his feet a bit pigeon-toed, Jughead was practically tripping over himself as he walked.

Archie had his arm around Jughead’s waist the entire time, leaving Jughead to place his over Archie’s shoulders. Although Archie’s steps were loud and uncoordinated, his touch was gentle and warm, again leaving that pit in the bottom of Jughead’s stomach. In his stupor, Jughead tried explaining it to Archie as the walked up to the entrance of the Walgreens. 

“No no no no no, it isn’t painful, it’s just…” Jughead stopped walking right in front of the Walgreens door, placing his right hand on his chin in a dramaticized gesture of thought. “It’s like a nice sort of warmth, like when you drink tea and it’s just a bit too warm, and it hurts to go down but it’s still nice so you keep drinking it? It’s like that.” Smiling and satisfied with his explanation, Jughead nodded as if to affirm his own point. He continued walking

Archie started to move again with Jughead, turning his head to stare at his friend. “Okay… that kind of makes sense. Why are you feeling that way again? I don’t think I’m understanding.”

Jughead stopped once more in his tracks. He turned his whole body to face Archie, his arm sliding down to rest on Archie’s right shoulder. Staring into Archie’s eyes, he said seriously, “I have no idea.”

Archie gulped, staring at his friend, eyes flitting from his lips to his eyes and back again. Before Archie could even think of moving, Jughead turned swiftly back around to face the entrance of the Walgreens.

“I’m hungry,” he said. “Let’s buy some food.”

*****

Although both Archie and Jughead tried to be clean and respectful in the store, it didn’t exactly turn out that way. There was only one lady working, a gray-looking older woman wearing a pink sweater and baggy jeans under a red apron with a nametag that said ‘Beatrice’.

Beatrice stared at Archie and Jughead as they went along, pursing her lips at them in a silent show of disappointment that neither boy noticed. Instead, they walked along with a red plastic basket, throwing in cookies and chips and a can of vanilla buttercream frosting because “I’m a growing boy, Andrews!”.

Eventually the two made it to the back corner of the store by the refrigerators, out of sight of Beatrice. Jughead began to argue with Archie over whether or not they should get ice cream. As Jughead protested against Archie’s claims that the ice cream would melt before they even got back to Archie’s, a loud boom sounded from outside the store. 

Both boys stopped speaking. Jughead stood perfectly still and stared at Archie, eyes widening an imperceptible fraction. Not noticing, Archie leaned forwards in order to see down one of the isles and out the glass windows in front of the store. Immediately, he saw a lightning bolt flash across the sky. Relieved, he began to move back towards Jughead. “It’s just a thunderstorm, don’t wor-” 

Another clap of thunder sounded above just as Archie noticed the state his friend was in. Jughead’s eyes were squeezed tightly shut, his whole body flinching when the thunder sounded. Still not opening his eyes, hands clenched into fists, Jughead murmured, “Oh, fuck.”

At once, Archie was reminded of all of the times in his childhood that Jughead had to stay at his house, all of the panic attacks that he had to help Jughead through, all of the late nights spent comforting his friend. Jughead may have been older, more tired and jaded, but he was still the same Jughead.

Luckily, Archie was also still the same Archie.

Immediately, Archie fell back into the routine that they had as children whenever Jughead would become anxious. He stepped forwards and slowly grasped one of Jughead’s shoulders and one of his hips, lowering him carefully to the ground before he ended up falling and hurting himself. Jughead let himself be moved to the floor, and Archie followed, sitting right beside his friend, their thighs and shoulders pressed together as they sat against one of the shelves at the end of an isle. 

Jughead was a bit slumped forward as he sat, his chest moving rapidly up and down and his cheeks tinged pink. His fingers were curled into tight fists that Archie knew from experience would sometimes leave cuts on his palms. Archie pulled one of Jughead’s hands into his own, uncurling the fingers from their tense positions. He placed the now-open hand on his own chest and began to breathe in a more exaggerated way than he had before.

“Hey, hey Jughead, I’m right here, alright, I know we aren’t at home, but you’re safe here with me, I won’t let anything happen to you, alright?” Jughead didn’t say anything, his breathing too out of control, but he managed a slight nod of his head. Archie breathed a sigh of relief. Although he knew how to handle his friend in these situations, it never wasn’t terrifying to see Jughead so vulnerable and hurting so badly. Archie sometimes felt like he was going to panic himself, but he knew he had to focus- he had a job to do.

Archie took a deep breath. “Juggie, can you try and match my breathing for me? You can feel my chest moving through on your hand, yes?” Another small nod from Jughead. Archie continued to take very exaggerated breaths, now accompanying those with a mantra of, “In… out… in… out…” Although it wasn’t a lot, it was the most that Archie could do to help his friend in times like these. After a few minutes, Archie stopped saying it out loud and just made sure that Jughead could feel him breathe.

As Archie sat with Jughead, he allowed his mind to wander a bit. Jughead had always had panic attacks and anxiety, ever since he was a child. Archie knew this, as he had to help Jughead through a fair amount of his attacks. When he was younger, they were normally triggered by anything loud or shocking- obviously, thunderstorms were a main culprit. However, loud airplanes flying overhead and realistic-sounding explosions from television or video games had also caused a problem once or twice.

When Jughead finally went to a doctor for his panic attacks, he was prescribed a medication called paroxetine to help stop his panic attacks. They seemed to work. After he began taking the medication, Jughead had only had one or two panic attacks that Archie knew of. Had his medication stopped working? Had Jughead stopped taking it? Although Archie was desperate to know so he could help Jughead, he knew now was not the time.

Archie had only asked Jughead once why he had panic attacks. They were in 8th grade, sitting alone in the cafeteria at lunch, the period after learning about mental illnesses in health class. Jughead had looked at Archie for a good ten seconds. He searched Archie’s eyes, looking for evidence of something. Whatever it was, he did not find it, and looked back down at the table in front of him.

Picking at the wrapper of his water bottle, Jughead answered almost robotically, “The doctor says they were caused by something in my childhood. I just think they were caused by my dad.” Archie snapped his head up to try and look at Jughead again. Jughead, however, didn’t look back Archie’s way. Instead, he spoke quietly, a hit of pain in his voice that convinced Archie to never ask Jughead another question about his anxiety.

“I don’t want to talk about this again.”

They never did.

After maybe ten minutes of Archie leading Jughead in slow breathing, Jughead finally straightened himself out, smoothing out the hunch that he had inadvertently created in his back. Archie kept his hand on top of Jughead’s, holding it to his chest, and Jughead didn’t pull away. Archie stopped breathing so heavily. Rain still poured on the roof overhead, but the thunder appeared to have stopped. They sat there for another few minutes, breaths in sync with each other, listening to the pitter patter of the raindrops on the roof above.

Jughead was the first to break the silence. “Sorry,” he murmured, so quietly that Archie almost thought he had imagined it. However, when Archie looked back at Jughead, he found that his friend was staring right back at him. 

“Don’t be sorry, dude,” Archie said immediately. “You have nothing to be sorry for.”

Jughead sent Archie a pointed look. “You sure about that?”

“Yeah,” Archie said, staring into Jughead’s eyes, “I’m sure.”

They sat for another moment looking at each other before Archie spoke again, standing up. “Want to try leaving? You can stay at my place tonight, obviously.”

Jughead smiled softly. “Yeah… yeah sure. Thank you.”

Archie paused in the middle of dusting his pants off from sitting on the floor to give a teasing glare to Jughead. “Bro, really? What did I just say? You don’t have to thank me.” Archie stretched out a hand and pulled Jughead up, slowly as to not jostle him.

“Just because I don’t have to doesn’t mean I don’t want to,” Jughead shot back, a tired grin on his face. “Fight me, Andrews.”

Archie rolled his eyes as he reached his arm behind Jughead to support him, mirroring their position from before, just for different reasons. “Good to know you’re back and still somehow tipsy, buddy,” Archie says, beginning to walk down one of the isles. As he walks, he passes an empty car stilled in the middle of the isle. Archie pauses, an idea coming to life. He walks himself and Jughead forwards with a bit more speed, causing Jughead to let out a squeak of protest. He cranes his neck around the isle until he can see the desk that the only night worker is stationed at. Smiling, he reaches his free hand up to wrap around his mouth, making sure that his target will hear what he’s going to say.

“Beatrice, can I ask you a huge favor?”

*****

“Although this probably looks stupid as fuck, I think this may be one of the best ideas you’ve ever had,” Jughead insists from where he sits, curled up in a red Walgreens shopping cart, holding an umbrella over his and Archie’s heads.

Archie snickers. “Oh yeah, you look ridiculous, but it’s still an incredible plan.” Archie continues to push the shopping cart down the sidewalk.

After explaining the situation to Beatrice, she was more than happy to let Archie take a cart to push Jughead home in, after they promised to return it tomorrow.

Jughead sighs. “You’re never letting this go, are you?” He says as they pull onto the Andrew’s driveway. 

Archie laughs, putting his arms out for Jughead to grab onto as he jumps out of the cart. “Are you kidding me? Of course I'm never letting this go.”

Carefully, Archie and Jughead make their way into the Andrew’s household using a key that Archie brought with him for the front door. The manage to limp their way up the stairs without any major mishaps, although Jughead is convinced that Archie stepping on his foot one time is considered a ‘major mishap’.

The two boys, comfortable with each other after years of friendship, strip into their underwear, Jughead choosing to leave his shirt on, Archie taking his off. They curl into the bed, Archie first, back pressed against the wall of the bed, facing his door, and Jughead’s back pressed flush against Archie’s chest. Archie tucks his chin into the crook between Jughead’s neck and shoulder, a gesture of comfort. Without even intending to, Jughead lets out a large sigh of contentment.

“If you ever want to talk,” Archie whispers, “I’m here for you. Always.”

Jughead feels moisture well up in his eyes as he takes in the significance of Archie’s statement. He quickly wipes his eyes. “T-thanks,” he says. “I appreciate it.”

And although Archie may not be able to help Jughead in every way, it’s the little things that matter to Jughead. And this declaration of affection means the world to Jughead.

**Author's Note:**

> If you'd like to chat, you can find me on tumblr at harryscurlsreallylouis.tumblr.com


End file.
